Friday, May 30, 2008

Random Observations

  1. If you live long enough, you die. Some folks live long enough sooner than others.
  2. Jesus saves. His bride consumes.
  3. When you know that you are right, get a reality check.
  4. Life happens. Then you move on. Deal with it.
  5. A lot of folks want a freedom advocate, but they don't want freedom. 
  6. A terrorist is a supercriminal against whom others justify superpenalties; these penalties are then available to impose upon you
  7. The law is the genitalia of the state. The state rapes through the law. The state births death through the law.  A constitution is a compromised condom.
  8. Everything against  the State.  Everything outside the State.  Nothing in the State.
  9. Does not matter if a collectivist is 'liberal' or 'conservative'; a wet dream is a wet dream no matter who is dreaming it. 
  10. When folks talk about paying a debt to society, they never mention the vig...
  11. I think prayer and masturbation are both better done in private, unless with somebody to whom you are really close. Children can figure out how to do either or both on their own.

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Thursday, May 29, 2008

Patriotic Americans must trash drug use. 11.15.89

Our Great Society is facing a major crisis-the illicit use of drugs- that threatens to undermine our social fabric, destroy our basic values and beliefs, endanger our children, and kill millions.

Our wise and benevolent government and our kinder and gentler President, George Bush, have declared war on drugs. Their program includes more prisons, money, and testing. But more, much more is needed.

President Bush should declare a state of emergency and suspend the Constitution for the duration of this crisis. We don't really need all those Constitutional rights, anyway. The Germans in the 1930's and 40's got along just fine without them. So do the Russians and the Chinese.

Drugs were not a problem in Germany and are not a problem in Russia and China because the penalty for drug dealing or use is typically death.

We must all realize that our leaders know better than we what is good for us, and we must let them do our thinking for us and decide what we should be allowed to have or use.

With the Constitution suspended, our government will be able to more effectively combat drug abuse. Of course, a few bleeding-heart-type liberals might object to the suspension, but they could be rounded up and shot.

The war against drugs will begin by instituting mandatory drug testing of all Americans. Anyone who tests positive will be shipped to a detention center and gassed.

Since drugs are such a threat to our youth, all our children will be body-searched. Any youngsters found with drugs will be garroted on the spot as an example to other children.

This will have two benefits: First drug use among children will be choked out; and second, there will be less overcrowding of classrooms.

The property of all drug subversives will be confiscated, sold, and the proceeds used to defray the costs of fighting drug abuse.

Ensuring a drug-free America requires the eradication of illegal drug crops, processing centres, and labs wherever they may be found. Within our beloved borders, toxic and radioactive wastes from sources such as Three Mile Island, Love Canal, or Chernobyl will be dumped on any area where drug crops are grown or processed.

This will not only growing of illicit plants unlikely, but help such wastes be put to good use. After we have a drug-free land, our kinder and gentler government could continue the program in other countries by nuking their drug crops, processing centers, and labs.

That is necessary to prevent us weak-willed Americans from being tempted by imported drugs. That would also put American nuclear weaponry to good use. It is the duty of all decent Americans to crush illegal drug use-even if it means renouncing our civil rights and liberties. It's a small price to pay for a drug-free American.

Warning: this essay contains Swiftian Analytical Logic Elements (SALEs).  Readers who are deficient in SALEs acumen may be offended. 
Reader indiscretion is not advised. 
This essay is for entertainment only. 
It has not been evaluated by any Federal agency, nor is it intended to diagnose, prevent, treat, or cure any condition.